digital_opium (
digital_opium) wrote2005-11-05 02:03 pm
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Entry tags:
Mental Constipation
Ironic that this week's topic in TM is control, or lack thereof.
Lately, all I do is feel like I have no control over anything.
I feel like I'm constantly waiting for something. Moving day, pay day, the day when we'll actually have some semblence of normalcy again.
The worst part is, I constantly feel like I can't do anything else until these other things get done. I feel like I'm just in stasis, that none of the million other things I need to do can even be started until the other things are accomplished.
TM has been my coping mechanism for a long while now. The ironic thing is that everything there is in a holding pattern as well. And I keep saying I'll catch up on this, that, the other thing, and I find myself in the same situation. I feel like I can't get those things done either, until I have some idea of where I'm going.
It's slowly driving me nuts.
Yes, I know none of this makes any sense. I need to find the thread. The one that I can pull on and it all unravels. Only in this case, unraveling the rest of this would be a huge relief. But I can't find that one thread, that starting point.
Argh.
Lately, all I do is feel like I have no control over anything.
I feel like I'm constantly waiting for something. Moving day, pay day, the day when we'll actually have some semblence of normalcy again.
The worst part is, I constantly feel like I can't do anything else until these other things get done. I feel like I'm just in stasis, that none of the million other things I need to do can even be started until the other things are accomplished.
TM has been my coping mechanism for a long while now. The ironic thing is that everything there is in a holding pattern as well. And I keep saying I'll catch up on this, that, the other thing, and I find myself in the same situation. I feel like I can't get those things done either, until I have some idea of where I'm going.
It's slowly driving me nuts.
Yes, I know none of this makes any sense. I need to find the thread. The one that I can pull on and it all unravels. Only in this case, unraveling the rest of this would be a huge relief. But I can't find that one thread, that starting point.
Argh.
no subject
I wish there was something I could think of to do. But if there is, tell me.
no subject
Take your time. Do things that you feel you can do, and you'll get it back. Believe me, I know what creative constipation feels like.
In the meantime, feel free to vent any time, and just stay cool, k?
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Thank you thank you.
Today is pretty good. Food made, shower taken, dishes done... almost a productive person. Go me.
Of course, the hubby isn't home... Cause or effect?
no subject
Go you...